Tryin' to Forget You
by psychoticphoenix
Summary: Because loving him was sweet misery. Written from a plot bunny my good friend fancyacupoftea gave me. Song: Cryin' by Aerosmith


**Author's Note: **Thanks to my best mate _fancyacupoftea _for giving me the prompt for this fic! Song is Cryin' by Aerosmith. The main prompt is the line in bold, but generally the song was the prompt.

**Disclaimer: **I own neither the characters nor the song. Duh. :)

* * *

**Tryin' to Forget You **

"_I think we should break up…" _These were the last words that Hermione Granger had said to Draco Malfoy before she left him over a year ago. He never really understood what made her end it, they were happy, they barely fought, and even if they did, they made up quickly. He knew that their relationship wasn't based on mere physical attraction. They were solid. Since she left, all that Draco asked himself was what had gone wrong.

Now she was standing in front of him, gaping in surprise. Her once bushy hair had tamed after the war, and today it was in a ponytail. She looked fine, Draco thought, knowing for his part he looked like hell. He's had a lot of sleepless nights rewinding their whole relationship in his mind, trying to figure out what he'd done wrong. Some nights he'd fall asleep with tears streaming from his eyes out of sheer sadness. Other nights he'd drink until he passes out on the cold tiled floor of the bathroom. Sometimes, when the thoughts were enough to drive him mad, he'd go to the roof of the manor and contemplate just ending it.

This was the first time they had crossed paths since they broke up, and she was obviously caught off guard. So was he, but not quite. Endless times he had rehearsed this scene in his mind. So when she made a move to walk past him, he quickly uttered the question he'd been dying to ask her since.

"Why?"

She stopped, turned and faced him. "Beg pardon?"

"Why did you…"

Hermione bit her lip, trying hard not to let her expressions betray her. "Draco, I…" Then she saw his eyes. The once cold mercurial orbs were gone and replaced by molten silver filled with pain. His face didn't show how much pain he was in, but his eyes did. Outwardly he still looked like the Draco she knew. The prat she had once punched in Hogwarts. The man who smirked at her by her office door, asking her out. The man who laughed with her over dinner, one that she had almost turned down because she didn't want to get to know the 'reformed' Malfoy, thinking he'd still be the arrogant boy he once was. The man she had fallen in love with. But the smirk was gone from his face, the smile wasn't there in his eyes, even his sneer wasn't to be seen.

"Please, I need to know."

His voice cracked then and Hermione's breath hitched. In the whole span of the relationship, she had never seen him act like this. She felt her throat tighten and she knew the tears would start falling if she didn't do something now. Before she could walk away again, he spoke again.

"Go out with me one last time. I… I just need to know."

He wasn't desperate; Draco tried to reason that what he was doing right now wasn't begging. Malfoys never beg. But eventually he gave up, knowing full well that he was begging, and that his heart would break even more if she refused.

"Hermione?"

"Okay." She whispered. "But only if Pansy and Ron go as well."

Draco wanted to question that. If they were going to have a sob fest, he wouldn't want their best mates to be there and witness it. But he decided not to. If this was his chance to finally find the answers to his questions, then he wouldn't try to question it.

"Alright."

"That same place then. Friday at eight. I'll see you there." And then she was gone.

Draco didn't need to confirm where. He knew. Oh, he knew alright.

The place where they used to hang out.

She wanted them to meet at the place where it all ended.

* * *

"I don't think this is going to be good." Pansy sighed when she got Hermione's owl. Her husband nodded, a worried look on his face.

Ron Weasley and Pansy Parkinson had been together since he'd professed his love for her at the Owlery once the war was over. Strange place to confess his undying love, yes, but that will be another story to tell.

"At least we'd be there if things get ugly." He told Pansy, who had slumped down by the doorstep of the Burrow.

"A crying Draco Malfoy isn't the highlight of my existence." She replied, staring at the letter Pigwidgeon had just delivered.

"Mine neither, but if Hermione wants us there, we should be there. Not just for her, for both of them."

Pansy nodded. "Prepare your best battle gear; we'd be in pieces if we don't come prepared."

Ron chuckled and joined her on the doorstep, remembering how broken their best mates were even after a long time since breaking up.

"_If you're going to be this teary, then you shouldn't have ended it with D in the first place!" Pansy had cried in frustration at Hermione's red puffy eyes. _

_Hermione had shaken her head and said, "No Pans, I needed to." _

_Pansy huffed. _

_Ron had stared at Draco while he downed firewhiskey after firewhiskey. "Whoa, mate, you might want to slow down there." _

"_Shut it, Weasel. I know Pansy told you to look after me, but I don't need to be watched over like a…" _

_He hadn't been able to finish his sentence because at that moment, Draco had passed out on the vomit filled floor of the Leaky Cauldron. _

_Ron sighed._

* * *

When Draco arrived, Hermione, Pansy and Ron were already seated at a table near the middle of the stage.

"Excuse me." Hermione muttered, standing just as Draco got to his chair.

Pansy shot Draco a sympathetic look and mouthed, "How are you?"

He gave her a noncommittal shrug and nodded an acknowledgement to Ron who nodded back.

Someone tapped the microphone onstage and the trio turned to look in shock at Hermione Granger. She never sang, no matter how they tried to force her when they hung out at this place before. They tried blackmail, bribery, begging and trickery to get her to sing, but she never did. Never.

"Don't tell me…" Pansy started.

"She's going to sing?" Ron finished, sharing puzzled looks with Draco and Pansy.

"This song was playing over a year ago." Hermione said, looking directly at Draco. "You might not have been listening, but I was. And it made me realize some things then…"

"She broke up with me because of a song?" Draco cried in shock. Ron and Pansy shrugged helplessly, and instead held him down to his chair so he wouldn't start smashing things out of madness.

"Hush, Draco. Listen. And maybe you'll understand." Hermione closed her eyes as the music started to play.

Draco listened. The song didn't make much sense to him and gave no answers, until Hermione opened her eyes again and stared right through his soul when she sang the next lines.

"I was cryin' when I met you,

now I'm tryin' to forget you.

**Your love is sweet misery**.

I was tryin' just to get you,

now I'm dying 'coz I let you

do what you do to me."

Hermione made it a point to look at him when she sang that line. Sweet misery. The perfect way to describe their relationship. In general it was alright, sweet. They loved each other and always found ways to work it out, and they'd be alright again. But every few months Hermione's façade would break, and misery would seep through. She tried her best to understand him, she really did. But there were times when it was just too much.

"I don't understand…" Draco murmured.

Pansy rolled her eyes. "Men."

Ron was about to retort when Pansy held up her hand. "Don't tell me you don't remember when you prioritized work over you anniversary. She forgave you, and you didn't even try to make it up to her. What, Draco, an owl? Is a letter supposed to make up for that day? Oh, and don't get me started about when she sobbed for hours on end because you haven't been giving her a decent conversation for several months! You say you're busy, she'd smile and say 'It's fine'. Well news flash, Draco! It wasn't FINE."

* * *

_Draco approached the figure by the window. "Hermione?"_

_She didn't turn to face him, but she twisted her body just a bit to indicate she heard him. _

"_Are you okay?" _

_She nodded. _

"_You sure." _

"_Yes, I'm fine, Draco." _

_Did her voice seem different? Draco shrugged and nodded. "Okay, if you say so. Listen, I'm really sorry I couldn't make it yesterday, I was really busy with work and…" _

"_Yes, I know."_

_Draco stopped. "Yes, well," he shuffled his feet on the carpet. "Sorry." _

"_I understand." _

_He breathed a sigh of relief and made a move to leave the room. "Hermione?" _

"_Yeah?" _

"_Happy Anniversary." He walked over and gave her a kiss on the cheek._

_She gave him a small smile. "Happy Anniversary." _

_After he left the room, Hermione's shoulders heaved and sobs started to wrack her body._

* * *

"It's down on me,

yeah I got to tell you one thing,

It's been on my mind,

boy I gotta say

We're partners in crime,

you got that certain something

What you give to me

takes my breath away

Now the word out on the street

Is the devil's in your kiss

If our love goes up in flames

It's a fire I can't resist"

"I…" Draco looked back to the stage where Hermione sadly sang to him. She looked back at him and nodded slowly.

* * *

"_Partners in crime huh?" She gave him an amused smile. _

"_Yeah." He laughed, playfully pulling her towards him. _

"_No Draco, I won't take part in this silly prank you plan to play on Ron." She said, still smiling._

"_Oh c'mon love." He grinned. "It's for the Weasel's birthday." _

_Hermione chuckled. "Stop calling him Weasel, he's your friend's husband for Merlin's sake. And not to mention my best friend." _

_He gave her a look of mock surprise. "I thought I was your best friend?" He asked with feigned hurt. _

_Hermione slapped his shoulder and leaned into him. "If you don't shut up that's all you'll ever be." _

_He stiffened, and when he saw the grin on her face, he let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. "You wouldn't be able to resist me." He poked her cheek. _

_Hermione's expression turned serious. "No, I wouldn't." She agreed quietly._

* * *

"She couldn't resist you. She loved you too much. Even if it hurt her too much." Pansy finished quietly.

"I was cryin' when I met you,

now I'm tryin' to forget you.

Your love is sweet misery.

I was tryin' just to get you,

now I'm dying 'coz I let you

do what you do to me."

Hermione didn't even finish the song. She jumped off the stage and ran out of the pub with tears falling freely from her eyes.

Draco stood and Pansy grabbed his hand to stop him. "I'm not going to stop you, D. But I'm going to tell you now that if it doesn't work out between you and Hermione now, you had it coming. Apologizing… how would it be different from before?"

Draco shook his head, crying as well. "I love her Pansy! I love her!" People were starting to stare now. Draco couldn't give a flying fuck about it. What mattered was catching up to Hermione and telling her how sorry he was for being such a stupid prick.

Pansy let go of her grip on his arm and nodded.

He found her crumpled by the sidewalk, sobbing uncontrollably. "Hermione…"

She raised her head to give him a wistful smile. "Hey you."

"Hermione, I'm so sorry."

She put a finger to her lips. "Hush."

"No, I was stupid, I was being such a… such a…"

Hermione stood up shakily. "Such a guy." she chuckled. It was true. Draco was being a typical guy. Forgetting dates, not realizing 'I'm fine' meant it's not fine, it was a guy thing.

"I made you miserable. I thought we were alright, but I was being blind to the truth. I'm sorry."

"Sweet misery, Draco."

"What?"

"It was a sweet misery."

She planted a tearful kiss on his lips before walking away.

* * *

"_I love you." He whispered into her hair. _

_She turned her head to plant a small kiss on his lips. "I love you too, Draco." _

_Hermione's eyes were puffy and red after all the crying she did. She arrived at the Burrow all frustrated and Pansy listened to her for an hour before she decided to call Draco. Despite Hermione's protests, Pansy insisted that Draco apparate there as soon as possible. When he arrived, he saw his girlfriend slumped over the couch, a cup of tea in her hand and a furious looking Pansy by her side. Before he could even say a word, Pansy started growling at him. _

"_NO, you shut up Draco; you listen to Hermione and don't make any comments until she's finished. You listen to her, and you two talk this out. She talked my ear off for an hour, and it's supposed to be you who hears these things, so shut up and listen."_

"_But I," _

"_I don't give a damn if you have an important meeting this afternoon. You need to talk this out!" Pansy had screamed before slamming the door. _

_And he stood there awkwardly until Hermione began to sob and scream and hiccup out all the things that have frustrated her for months. "You wouldn't even talk to me unless necessary for SIX MONTHS!" she added, with a gasp for breath. _

_He sat down beside her and talked things out with her and here they were, having come to a compromise two hours later, exchanging sweet and loving words. _

_For the next days, they had rekindled their old passion for each other, finding time for each other and owling sweet nothings at unexpected times, and being sickeningly sweet that even Harry winced when he was with them. _

_In a month he had reverted back to the distant Draco that frustrated her so._

* * *

Draco stood there, willing himself to run after her again, but before he could even take a step, she had apparated. And as if to mock his tears, rain started to fall, drenching him. He felt a hand on his shoulder, and he turned and saw Ron and Pansy standing there.

Ron gave him a nod and Pansy a sympathetic look.

Draco's mind flashed back to that day.

"_I think we should break up." _

_He looked at her in shock, trying to see if it was all a joke, but her tears told him it wasn't. _

"_I love you Draco, but I think we should break up." _

_I love you…_

* * *

**Author's Note: **So, how was it?


End file.
